white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
