Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Randomize