i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
