At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
