How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
