We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
