Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
