He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
My hand turned me down
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
