yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
