No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
