I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
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He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
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bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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