it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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