Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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