if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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