what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
