my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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