North Korea, Best Korea!
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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