his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
