Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
