If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
