Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
