i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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