i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
