I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
