so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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