I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
