So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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