just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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