Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I think your dad took our porno
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
