i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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