last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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