I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
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