She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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