you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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