last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He better not be in your backpack
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
