New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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