My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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