She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
