dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you didnt know i had herpes?
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I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
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I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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