At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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