dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
