we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize