I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
