i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
