some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
