Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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