its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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