i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You did what with his pubic hair?
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