i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
