sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
