there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
