Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
